What Happiness Looks Like (Promises) Read online

  Holding Ryan’s hand, Dalton came close. “She’s not in the river, Joely. She’s probably lost in the woods.”

  She looked downriver to the dense forest, the perfect hiding place in the eyes of a five-year-old. Dalton said something about the police and getting her cane. She couldn’t wait for that. Her legs were already pulling her away when she asked him to call Kate, too. Through sheer determination, she forced her body to carry her. “An-na! An-na!”

  The whoosh of the nearby river taunted her. Surely Anna knew better than to go anywhere near it, didn’t she? Anna was smart, but she was only five. She still believed in aliens and unicorns and fairies. Making her way closer to the forest, Joely clenched her fists and screamed at the top of her lungs.

  Then a cloud ripped open, releasing the rain.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

  LILY

  Dear Dayna,

  Good news! Butch said we can move back in—you and me! I’ve been bringing you over to his trailer, hoping that he will see how you have his same nose, kind of flat and wide at the bottom. It’s so cute. Plus your attached earlobes and your stubby toes come from him.

  He said you don’t cry as much as he thought you would. (That’s because I take you over there right after your feeding, when you’re full and fat and sleepy.)

  I packed up what I could into the two Wal-Mart plastic bags I brought with me. Even though I left all of the clothes Mrs. H bought me behind, I still filled the diaper bag and had left-over stuff. I had to leave the stroller and the big bottle of Johnson’s baby wash. We can use regular soap, probably, or shampoo. It’s raining so I called Butch and he’s going to pick us up in his car.

  I didn’t tell Mrs. H we were going because I was afraid she would try to talk me out of it. She thinks I’m smart and wants me to climb the career ladder or something, but I’m definitely not college material.

  I’m also not my mom. I will never lose interest in you or let Butch or anyone hurt you. You will be safe with me.

  Your mom,

  Lily

  KATE

  Kate had a bad feeling when the phone rang that evening. Sheets of rain streamed down the dark windows. She’d fallen asleep watching TV on the couch, pondering Evan’s note. Guilt over their more-than-friends relationship prevented her from spooning with Mitch upstairs in bed. She crossed the room and picked up the phone. “Hello?”

  “Kate Hopper? This is Officer Gorman. Zoe’s mother.”

  Zoe was the little girl with cancer, the one with clear blue eyes that never cried. Dread filled Kate’s chest. “Is Zoe alright?”

  “Yes. I’m afraid I have some bad news, though. I just left the scene of a fatal accident.”

  Her first thought went to Mitch, even though she knew he was safe upstairs. She’d heard Lily sneak out not too long ago, so she, Joely and Anna were all unaccounted for. She sucked in her breath. “Who?”

  “Evan Holmes.”

  Starting to sway, she leaned her back against the wall. “Oh my God. What happened?”

  “He was on a motorcycle and hit a tree. We’re not sure if he swerved to miss hitting an animal or what.”

  She slid down onto the floor. “He wasn’t wearing a helmet, was he?” She already knew the answer.

  “No, I’m afraid not.”

  Wondering if it had been an accident or suicide, the phone started to shake in her hand. Evan had been so down lately. Plus he’d given Joely that odd note:

  “Please Help Me

  Take Care Of Bobby”.

  Her hand covered her mouth in horror. “What about his son? Is he OK?”

  “That’s why I’m calling you. The babysitter is a twelve-year-old girl. She said that Evan gave her your number in case of an emergency.”

  Kate couldn’t speak. This didn’t make sense.

  The woman continued in a business-like voice. “Technically, I’m supposed to take the child so he can be placed into a temporary foster care home. But you know how scary that must be for a kid, to go into an unfamiliar place with strangers. I would hate for that to ever happen to Zoe. . . I’m bending the rules here, but if you were willing, I’d let the boy stay with you until we can locate a family member or relative.”

  Kate thought of the little boy who stuck his nose against the aquarium at the doctor’s office. She thought of the little boy who called her “Kay”. She thought of the little boy sleeping in his crib, his mouth forming a tiny “O” as he clutched his stuffed dragon. Swallowing, she tried to find her voice. “Yes. I’ll take Bobby. Can you bring him here or do you want me to go over there?”

  “I can bring him to you. I’ll pack some of his things first.”

  Realizing that Bobby might be scared of the police officer, Kate reconsidered. “I’ll be right over. Don’t forget to pack his green dragon. It’s probably in his bed.”

  As she sped through the rain to Evan’s split-level house, she thought again about the possibility of suicide. He had asked for her help on more than one occasion. Why hadn’t she listened?

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

  JOELY

  Two beams of light came toward Joely in the darkness. Thank God help was here.

  Dalton shouted Joely’s name to locate her, then slipped a rain poncho over her soaked shoulders. “The police are on their way.” He gave her one of the flashlights and her cane. “Your sister wasn’t home, but Mitch is coming.”

  Anger flared. Where was Kate when she needed her?

  Dalton shone his flashlight beam toward the right. “How about I head over there while you continue this way?”

  Again, she didn’t take the time to speak. With barely a nod, she started hiking. She plowed through the mud and the forest’s underbrush as if in a desperate three-legged race. “Anna, where are you?”

  The hood of her poncho fell. Was Anna wearing a coat? Joely scanned her memory. Probably. It had been a little chilly at the park earlier. But was she wearing her favorite yellow sweater with the embroidered daisies or was it something waterproof? Joely couldn’t remember. She prayed that it was her windbreaker.

  Even so, Anna would be cold and damp by now. And scared.

  A chill shook Joely’s body. She pulled her hood back up.

  But Anna likes the rain, Joely told herself. She liked to watch it dapple against the car window while singing “Somewhere over the Rainbow”. But this wasn’t dapple against the window kind of rain. This was windshield wipers on full-blast, whipping back and forth, still unable to see the road, kind of rain.

  She shouted her daughter’s name again. For a few seconds, she stopped and listened, hoping to hear Anna’s voice. Instead, all she heard was the rattle of the rain hitting leaves. “Anna!” Her throat felt raw. “Anna!”

  Blackness surrounded her. Then something pricked her ears. Pausing to listen, she realized that her mind must’ve been playing tricks on her. There wasn’t anything.

  She never should’ve let Anna out of her sight. This was her fault.

  Even though the cane made her movements awkward, she knew that she needed its extra support. Angry at her crippled body, she ignored its complaints and kept moving forward.

  “Anna? Where are you?”

  Nothing. The night seemed both loud and quiet. Her heart banged inside her chest.

  “Anna!” Her voice more forceful this time. Still no answer.

  Lightening flashed.

  Oh God. She hoped Anna wasn’t sitting under a tall tree. Had Joely warned her about trees and thunderstorms? She couldn’t remember. There was so much she hadn’t told her daughter. So much more she needed to say.

  She didn’t want to live if anything happened to Anna. “Anna!” Her volume maxed out. “Anna!” Please, God, keep Anna safe. She’s just a little girl.

  Thunder cracked through the sky and her heartbeat jumped. “Anna!” Her yells paled in comparison to nature’s wrath.

  From behind, she heard sirens and could see the flashing red lights reflecting off the clouds. She hoped they’d sent out the entir
e Foxworth police department. As she pushed forward, her toe caught on something. She grabbed at a tree branch as she went down. It snapped and she fell on all fours. Pummeled by rain, she paused for a moment to catch her breath. All of her joints hurt, but she didn’t care. She had to keep going. She had to find Anna.

  Maternal instinct fueled her. Clutching her muddy cane, she forced herself up.

  Then she thought she heard something again. So faint. Could it be her? Her heart rate accelerated.

  In her mind, she took off toward the sound as if she were an Olympic runner. In reality, she hobbled at a frustratingly inadequate pace. The beam of her flashlight swung up and down as she moved forward, providing no real guidance. She could easily trip on another tree root or rock. But there was no way she was slowing down. “Anna!”

  A tiny sound in the distance: “Mommy?”

  Relief flooded and re-energized her body. “Anna?” Somehow she quickened her gait.

  They called back and forth: Anna—Mommy—Anna—Mommy. Her heart pounded.

  Then she saw her, crouched underneath a tree, her frail arms wrapped around her knees. She was in the fetal position. Anna’s hair stuck to her cheeks. She was wearing her favorite, yellow daisy sweater.

  Dropping her light and cane, Joely hurtled herself forward.

  She tucked Anna’s shivering body underneath her poncho, forming a cozy nest. Tears ran down Joely’s face as she wrapped her arms around her daughter.

  Tight. So tight.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

  JOELY

  The police insisted Anna go to the hospital. Dalton had offered to come with them, but Joely told him to tuck Ryan into bed—it was already way past his bedtime, she was sure.

  Anna sat on an exam table covered with white paper and swung her legs over the edge.

  Joely rubbed a towel against Anna’s blond curls. Adrenaline continued to loop through her. Dropping the towel, she folded her arms around Anna’s lean body and hugged her again.

  Anna giggled. “Mom, you can stop worrying now. I’m OK.”

  Joely gave a weak smile, tears brimming in her eyes. “I was afraid you’d fallen into the river.” A drop rolled down each cheek.

  With her tiny thumbs, Anna wiped Joely’s tears. “Don’t worry. If I had, I would’ve kicked and made big scoops with my arms like Daddy taught me.”

  Joely was definitely signing Anna up for swim lessons as soon as possible. “Are you hungry? Thirsty? I can get you something.”

  Anna shook her head. “Mommy, did you forget? Uncle Mitch went to the cafeteria to get me French fries.”

  Joely had forgotten—her mind a jumble of thoughts and emotions. Mitch had come right away when Dalton had called, but Kate was still missing. Joely hoped her sister hadn’t been in an accident. A night like this could cause a lot of misery.

  Anna’s eyebrows shot up and she grinned her toothless grin. She pointed past Joely’s shoulder.

  Joely turned around to see what Anna was looking at. Jake filled the doorframe with his six foot two frame. He rushed forward and embraced Anna. “Are you OK?”

  Anna nodded. “I got lost playing hide-n-seek.”

  Joely cleared her throat. “At night. In a thunderstorm.”

  “It wasn’t raining when we started playing.” Again, Anna kicked the exam table with her heels. “Daddy’s here. Daddy’s here.” She reached toward him for another hug.

  Jake squeezed her then touched her chin. “Has a doctor seen you yet?”

  Anna shook her head and Joely spoke up. “We’re a low priority, I guess. With the storm, there have been a lot of car accidents.”

  Worry lines etched across his brow. “My daughter is not low-priority. As soon as I get a doctor in here and you’re declared the most awesome little girl in the world, I’m taking you to the gift shop and you can pick out anything you want.”

  Anna clapped her hands. “Yippee!”

  After she watched him exit, Joely followed him out into the hall. She lowered her voice. “How did you know we were here?”

  He ran his hand through his dark blond hair. “Mitch called me.” He checked his watch. “Made it here in record time. I’m lucky I didn’t get a speeding ticket.”

  “Or get in an accident yourself.” Joely studied his blue eyes, trying to deny the warmth growing inside her chest. She watched him march toward the nurse’s station, confident he would get what he wanted. Glad that Anna’s well-being was the thing that he wanted.

  A little while later, the doctor discharged Anna and explained that the gift shop was closed. Anna started counting by thousands as she walked with Joely, Jake and Mitch down the windowed corridor. When they reached the end, they stood at the hospital’s glass doors watching the rain.

  Mitch shook Jake’s hand. “Glad you could make it.” He looked at Joely as if to say, “I knew he’d come through.” Instead, he said, “I’ll see you back at the house.” She nodded and watched him take off through the rain, holding his coat over his head as a shield.

  The three of them lingered a moment. What was it about the rain that made people hesitate? Joely squeezed Anna’s hand as a flash of lightning illuminated the parking lot.

  Jake pointed toward her car parked in the closest non-handicapped spot. “Is that yours?”

  Joely nodded and Anna started counting again, “One-one thousand, two-one thousand. . .”

  He peered out the window, squinting. “It looks to me like you have a flat tire.”

  Joely released Anna’s fingers. “No-o-o.” She used her hands to block the light from inside the hospital and gazed out the window. Everything outside looked black and shiny—the pavement, her car, her tires. Even though she was parked under a light, it was hard to tell from there.

  Anna mumbled to herself. “Five-one thousand, six-one thousand. . .”

  “The tire on the passenger’s side looks flat,” he said.

  “Great.” Joely sighed. How had that happened? Maybe she’d run over a nail on the way in. They were building a new housing development near the hospital.

  He gave Joely a sympathetic look. “Why don’t I give you a ride home?”

  She shook her head. “Then I’ll have to ask Kate or Mitch to drive me back here tomorrow to pick up my car.” The last thing she wanted to do was ask them for another favor. She was starting to realize that she’d asked them for too much.

  Thunder rattled the windows. Anna clapped. “The storm is moving away from us. If you count the number of seconds between the lightning and thunder and compare them, you can tell which direction the storm is going.”

  Shoving his hands in his pockets, he looked at Joely. “Do you have AAA?”

  She laughed. “Right. I can’t afford that.” She sighed again. “Will you stay here with Anna while I go change it?”

  “No way.” He held out his palm. “Give me your keys and I’ll go change the tire. You take AJ over there and wait.” He gestured toward a nearby seating area.

  Joely looked at the four chairs placed in a circle, but didn’t move. “Do you even know how to change a tire?”

  Apparently insulted, Jake made a face. “Yes. I know how to change a tire. Now give me those keys.”

  Joely bit her lip. She didn’t really want to change a tire in the rain. The last time she’d had a flat, she’d stomped on the lug wrench and still could barely get it to turn. But she hated to ask Jake to do it either. “What about the lightning? I don’t want you to get electrocuted.”

  Anna tugged on Joely’s sleeve. “Mom, I told you the storm is moving away.”

  Raising his eyebrows, Jake wiggled his fingers near Joely’s chin. “It won’t take me long.”

  With a shrug, Joely fished the keys out of her purse and placed them in his hand. “Thanks.”

  He pulled his coat up over his head just like Mitch had, then made a mad dash for the car. Joely did not take Anna over to sit down. Instead, they stood watching through the streaming windows as Jake jacked up the car and twisted the lug wrench. Fort
unately, Anna was right. The lightning had subsided.

  Jake, the king of grand gestures and lack of follow-through, changed her tire in the pouring rain. He wasn’t especially fast, but he did get the job done. He’d driven an hour and a half just to give his daughter a hug and make sure she was OK. The old Jake would’ve called the gift shop and had them send Anna a bouquet of “get well soon” balloons.

  Anna’s wish had finally come true. Her daddy loved her.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

  JOELY

  Joely woke up early the next morning because Anna woke up early. Anna had begged to sleep in her mom’s double bed, which they sometimes did when Anna had a bad dream. Last night had certainly been a bad dream for Joely. Secretly she was glad for Anna’s request so she could hear her daughter’s steady breathing on the pillow next to her all through the night.

  Now Anna kicked off the floral sheets. “Can I go see if Aunt Kate is awake?”

  Joely checked her Picasso wall clock. Seven a.m. Her mind filled with fog. She wasn’t sure if it was a workday or a weekend. “Why don’t you go watch PBS Kids for a while?”

  Anna bounded out of bed and stopped when she tried to turn the doorknob. Suddenly Joely remembered Lily’s knife and the fight she’d had with Kate.

  Usually curious, Anna didn’t bother to ask why the door was locked, she simply opened it and ran barefooted out of the room. Television first thing in the morning was a real treat.

  Joely rubbed her tired eyes. Although she loved snuggling with Anna, she hadn’t slept well beside her. When she had managed to actually sleep, she’d had nightmares about finding Anna flat on her back covered in blood, stabbed by the branch of a fallen tree. Obviously her subconscious had merged her two fears.

  Remembering the night’s events, anger welled inside of her. She shouldn’t have listened to Dalton when he said it was OK for the kids to play outside alone. She should’ve listened to her gut.

  Her hands clenched. She hated herself for letting Anna get lost. Anna could’ve been hurt or even killed. Joely shook her head.